"We are all in the gutter, but some of us..."
Taking Trash Seriously.
"...are looking at the stars."
-- Oscar Wilde
December 1, 2005
Price: Your 2¢

This site is updated Thursday afternoon with a new article about an artistic pursuit generally considered to be beneath consideration. James Schellenberg probes science-fiction, Carol Borden draws out the best in comics, Chris Szego dallies with romance and Ian Driscoll stares deeply into the screen. Click here for their bios and individual takes on the gutter.

While the writers have considerable enthusiasm for their subjects, they don't let it numb their critical faculties. Tossing away the shield of journalistic objectivity and refusing the shovel of fannish boosterism, they write in the hopes of starting honest and intelligent discussions about these oft-enjoyed but rarely examined artforms. Contact us here.


Recent Features


Alan Moore Knows The Score

LEG Century 80.jpg“It's nice to hear all the old songs, isn't it?”

--the Devil, The Black Rider

I was surprised to hear the old songs in Alan Moore and Kevin O'Neill's The League of Extraordinary Gentlemen Century: 1910 (Top Shelf, 2009). I probably shouldn't have been. The chapter title, “What Keeps Mankind Alive” distracted me, but I kept reading my water-damaged copy and ran smack into, “Mack the Knife.” Like the chapter title, it's a song from Bertolt Brecht and Kurt Weill's The Threepenny Opera.

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Breaking into the Business by Being Really, Really Disturbing

waspfactory-small.jpgDisturbing as hell, an elegantly constructed first-person plunge into the mind of a maniac, a teenager who murdered kids when he was a kid (and got away with it), and now has elaborate rituals that mostly involve killing small mammals. As a first novel, that's one way to make a splash - The Wasp Factory by Iain Banks is a debut from 1984, famous for its controversial events and intense narration. I'm always a little suspicious of controversy though - is the book worth anything outside of the scandal associated with its "shocking" content?

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I Got 99 Problems But a Bitch Ain't One

weefab.JPGSarah Wendell and Candy Tan occupy some interesting real estate in the romance world; a previously untenanted corner of Innernet and Romancelandia. Smart Bitches, Trashy Books is a different sort of headspace when it comes to a website about Romance novels.  It's frank, forthright, and not above fart jokes. 

Wendell and Tan don't just review novels, they also subject them to analysis, and praise or pan them as the situation requires. They demonstrate an unquenchable and exuberant love for the entire genre, while acknowledging - and even celebrating - its most ridiculous excesses. They've amassed an interesting and intelligent readership who tune in for the commentary and stay for fun. They even popularized the ever-useful phrase ‘man-titty’ as a descriptive aid in the discussion of cover art.  And now the original Smart Bitches have written a book of their own: Beyond Heaving Bosoms: The Smart Bitches’ Guide to Romance Novels

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The Never-Fail Recommendation

by James Schellenberg

Murder, ghosts, treasure, sex and jokes in 7th century ChinaI get a lot of people asking me for book recommendations. That's not all that strange, considering how much I read, and that I write a lot of reviews. All the same, I still find it hard to know what to say sometimes... tastes are so different. And I've been burned before by bad feedback.

I have one book that has never failed me yet. Friends, family, genre fans, non-readers, the dubious... it doesn't matter, they all fall under the spell of this particular title.

I'm talking about a book called Bridge of Birds by Barry Hughart, and I'm (slightly) exaggerating the case for it. It's an obscure novel from 20 years ago, obscure mainly because of publisher screwups (see below). People simply didn't know about it.

That's a shame because Bridge of Birds has everything the demanding reader might want. Grisly murders and ghosts and narrow escapes from death? Check. Hilarious scams such as a goat that apparently poops gold coins, mummified Buddhist monks that rise from the dead to scare mourners away from an expensive funeral ceremony, or grand lies about the art of porcupine cookery by way of the Elixir of Eighty Evil Essences? Check. Insight into Chinese culture? Unusual magic? A tightly woven mystery with a perfect wrap-up? Check, check and check.

Hughart also writes a very difficult thing: a cross-cultural novel that does not suffocate under the weight of its own importance. With only one or two exceptions, the songs and poems in the book are real, but they don't feel like homework. Hughart's evocation of Chinese culture is very bright and vivid, and enormously funny. It's a great example of how a tale well told can teach a reader more than twenty textbooks.

Murder, ghosts, treasure, sex and jokes in 7th century ChinaNumber Ten Ox is from a small village, and some children in his town have been poisoned. The only antidote to their lingering coma is the Great Root of Power. Ox finds the elderly sage Li Kao to help the village, and Li Kao is an inspired invention. He mentions his "slight flaw in his character" to everyone he meets, and we soon learn that it's a scary ruthlessness -- the book has some quite gruesome scenes. Also, whenever Ox has a chance to kiss the ladies, Li Kao wishes that he were ninety again. So an alcohol-swilling, scam-pulling 100+ year old, scholarly and spry, and his peasant friend who narrates the story -- not exactly Holmes and Watson!

As my summary makes clear, Bridge of Birds has a variety of tones to it. Hughart swings from ultraviolence to a cheap gag in an instant, and he somehow makes it work. He also writes in a pseudo-highbrow prose at times, and the floweriness somehow suits the adventures he is describing. For example:

Li Kao chewed thoughtfully on his beard and then he said, "Ho, Ox and I are wrapped in so many chains that we can't move, you are attached to the wall by a leg chain, this dungeon is solid rock, the torture chamber is crammed with soldiers, we are eleven stories beneath the earth, and each landing is guarded by more soldiers. The palace is swarming with the army of the Ancestress, the army of the Duke of Ch'in is camped outside the walls, and Ox and I must escape from here immediately. Unless you look forward to being drawn and quartered, I suggest that you accompany us."

"I think that's a splendid idea," said Henpecked Ho. (217)

The three scoundrels get out of course, but how could they possibly surmount such odds?

I've mentioned that the book is also a mystery and that it has a strong wrap-up. Hughart leaves clues all along the way as to secret identities and strange coincidences. As you read, you start to wonder how the pieces could all fit together, but just like the escape from the dungeon, Hughart has an entertaining and memorable solution. The ending is a case study in how to not let your reader down at the end of the story.

Hughart wrote Bridge of Birds in 1984, and he followed it up with two sequels, The Story of the Stone and Eight Skilled Gentleman. The sequels are worth checking out, even if they are not quite as funny. Hughart got severely jerked around by the publishers who miscategorized his books, released them early (that it to say, out of sync with the advertising and reviews) or with the hardcover and paperback simultaneously or only to the miniscule number of science fiction/fantasy specialty stores. He has not written anything since.

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Thanks for this article. I picked this book up purely by chance a couple of years ago, and was completely floored. It's also one of the few books (possibly the only one) I recommended to my wife which she genuinely liked. It's especially great for people who don't like "fantasy." Thanks also for the background info on the author.

—Ryan

Too right. Bridge of birds is great and sadly unknown. I hadn't thought of passing it around to friends (I might not get it back), but I'll at least suggest they get it.

—Xian Plus

Hey Xian Plus,

I'm always on the lookout for extra copies, but it's not that common anymore. And when someone reads it, I think they like it so much they subconsciously "forget" to return my copy... All in a good cause I guess!

—James Schellenberg


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Hey Xian Plus,

I'm always on the lookout for extra copies, but it's not that common anymore. And when someone reads it, I think they like it so much they subconsciously "forget" to return my copy... All in a good cause I guess!

—James Schellenberg

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Of Note Elsewhere
"Geisha is Robot." Geisha fight samurai, giant temples and lady tengu. Geisha also transform.
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Mladen Sekulovich, aka Karl Malden, has died at 96. He was in many, many entertainments, including Meteor, the legendary 1970s cop show The Streets of San Francisco, some very respectable films and many, many Westerns like How The West Was Won, Nevada Smith and One-Eyed Jacks. Obituaries here, here and here.

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In support of my latest Screen article, there's nothing disappointing about these re-imagined posters by Olly Moss. Or x-factor-e's De Niro stream. Or the endlessly entertaining Film the blanks (Sudoku for film geeks).
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Champion Mojo storyteller Joe Lansdale talks about what makes him a champion: a crazy number of upcoming stories, a Jonah Hex animated short and his mighty understanding of the publishing industry.(Thanks, Chuck!)
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"If the post-"Crouching Tiger" boom in Asian cinema was an irrational, Dutch-tulip-style bubble, then the virtual disappearance of Asian films from American screens is an equally irrational overcorrection." Andrew O'Herir interviews Grady Hendrix (NYAFF and formerly Kaiju Shakedown), Keith Allison (Teleport City) and Todd Stadtman (4DK) about corrections, industry incompetence and piracy.
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